Praying…

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As a mother, and as a parent, I feel an enormous responsibility to be “perfect” for my children. I want them to only see Christ in me, and not see my failures at all. Now, I know that this is not possible, but it doesn’t make me want it less. I have prayed that the Lord would only show Himself to them, and work in them in spite of me.

Caleb and I pray with the boys for every meal, and we take turns praying with each child before bed. Recently, Peter has started reminding me at every meal that it’s time to pray! Even with his mouth stuffed full of food, he will clap his hands at me, and put them together, and bow his head. When his mouth is empty, he will say, “Pay?” as he bows his head. As a mother, this is absolutely heart warming to me! To get to see the working of the Lord in their hearts, is wonderful!

A few nights ago, as Hudson and Caleb were about to pray for bed, Hudson started his prayer on his own. He started off with “‘sus” (Jesus), and started saying a bunch of other things I could not understand, but it was very clear that he was praying. As Caleb and I watched him, he talked to his Jesus, just like a child talking to a parent. I am so thankful that He is moving in spite of me!

My boys are growing up! They love being big boys, and helping Daddy! Especially when we do outdoor chores or activities!

 

Saying "Cheese"

Saying “Cheese”

Pardon the lack of makeup!

Pardon the lack of makeup!

Hudson LOVES bananas, and he has started asking for them still in the peeling...he holds it in his hand, and smashes it in his mouth like a little monkey!

Hudson LOVES bananas, and he has started asking for them still in the peeling…he holds it in his hand, and smashes it in his mouth like a little monkey!

Washing the car with Daddy! Such big helpers! Especially if it involves water!

Washing the car with Daddy! Such big helpers! Especially if it involves water!

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The Beds

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This has a very ominous tone in my head when I read it….The beds. But I figure that’s because I have been living with the beds (oh, there it goes again!) for a little over a month now.

So, let’s set this up….a few months ago, Hudson started learning how fun it was to climb on everything! This included climbing into his crib (not out of his crib yet), and he thought that was awesome. So about a month of that, and I started getting very nervous about them learning to climb out. It just takes once haha. Also, the boys decided it was also tons of fun, to stick their entire legs through the slats of their cribs, but once they did that, they could not get them back out. So, about 4 times every nap time, and night time, I would have to go in there and get their legs unstuck. There were quite a few times, I would start to panic, as I could not get Peter’s knee back through the crib.

I knew it was getting close to thattime (ooh) of getting big boy beds for them, but I still kept putting it off, as the thought of sleep training 2 toddlers absolutely terrified me, and still does!

May 8th, Hudson climbed out of his crib….he climbed onto his piano, and didn’t quite get his footing, and hit his ribs on the keys, and then fell the rest of the way to the ground. Bloody nose, busted lip, bruises on his chest all came from this, and Caleb and I decided, that was it…time for toddler beds.

Now, I had always said I would never do toddler beds, and I wanted to do twin sized beds…well, I still “believe” in that, but, their room does not allow for 2 twin sized beds to fit, so we did toddler beds, which are cheaper for now anyways…

So, May 9th, the day the boys turned 18 months (coincidentally), Caleb and I set up their room…Grandmama took care of them for the day, and we cleaned out our closet (to make room for cribs),  and then set up their room, and toddler-proofed it a little more.

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They were ecstatic when they saw their room for the first time…LOVED their beds, and immediately laid down, and pretended to sleep.

Still terrified, we put the boys to sleep that night, and we only had to tell them once to get back in their beds, before they fell sound asleep for the night. PRAISE THE LORD!!!

I told Caleb that night, “It can’t be this easy, people will hate us!” Well, it isn’t that easy haha…naptime is still a battle, but at least naptime still happens…2 naps, I might add…as much as I have tried to go down to one, the boys won’t have it, and still need their 2 naps. Hey, I don’t mind!

Sicknesses, and stresses, and issues have made these toddler beds a source of pain for me hahaha, (exaggerating a bit), and I find myself reminiscing on the days of cribs, and children that could not get out of their rooms by themselves.

Every morning, though, 2 little boys open their door, open our door, and come wake Mommy up, and the smiles on those little faces so early in the morning is so sweet, and as much as I miss the little preemie men, I LOVE these big little men, and I am so proud of the boys they are growing up to be!

Giving Bubba a hug

Giving Bubba a hug

Zoo Days

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For Christmas this past year, I asked Caleb for one of 2 things…a annual pass to the Houston Zoo, or a Texas State Park Pass. My boys LOVE being outside. It is their favorite activity to do, I’m pretty sure they inherited that from both their parents! Unfortunately, in an apartment, we only have a small patio, completely covered, and although, they love playing out there, it’s just not the same.

So, I asked for something that would get us all outdoors and enjoying ourselves, and that the boys would love!

Well, Caleb gave me a zoo pass, and after just a few visits, it has already paid for itself, and we have most of the year left! The boys love the zoo. They love birds and elephants and monkeys. It is fascinating to them, and they can’t get enough!

This last zoo visit was a PERFECT day! Not too cool, not very breezy at all, just enough to make it a very enjoyable day! Aunt Mandy was able to join us, and we all had a blast!

Enjoy my boys enjoying life!

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Playing together….with words!

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I have waited 16 months to write this post. I have dreamed about this moment and prayed, and encouraged this day to come to fruition! And here we are:

A few days ago, my boys….played together!!!! Not co-existed, playing side by side, but mostly ignoring…this was true boy fun! Peter would throw the ball to Hudson, which would make them both laugh, and then Hudson would run and get it, and throw it back to Peter! After the ball got old, they began wrestling! Peter would knock Hudson over, and climb on him, and stare into his face, and Hudson just laughed so very hard. I watched them with literal tears in my eyes, and the biggest smile on my face! For those of you without twins, I assume this quite different for you. It was similar to hearing my boys say my name for the first time. It is a thrill and a joy to see!

Along with that, today, Peter had the funniest conversation with Hudson…he would stand right in front of him, and say something very seriously haha. Hudson just looked at me with a very puzzled look on his face, and then we all laughed.

I wish you could spend some time in my home, seeing my boys at their most comfortable places. Hearing their silly conversations, watching them dance, and play together. If you did though, I’d feel pressure to clean 😉 so maybe this way is a better way to share it all.

I have to brag on my sweet Peter Bug. In just the past two weeks, his vocabulary has grown leaps and bounds! He learned, “No, don’t, Hudson, done, cup, whoa, uh-oh, yes, turtle, pizza, milk, Grandmama, book, truck, cracker.” Yes, all this in just 2 weeks! And he can sing! And he will clap along with the music, or wave his hands, like he’s directing! I think we have one smart cookie on our hands! Unfortunately my Bug is also a bit shy, so he doesn’t share these words with just anyone haha.

My sweet Hudson. He amazes me daily with how much he can do. Every day, he will figure something else out that I would never have thought could happen. He has a very analytical mind like his Daddy, that Mommy doesn’t share hahaha, so maybe that’s why it amazes me so much 😉

I am so proud to be the Momma to two very sweet boys, and I wish I could share them daily with you all! In the meantime, enjoy the pictures!

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Make ‘Em Laugh

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Some of you know this song from the musical Singing in the Rain…for sure, one of my favorite movies! I was reminded of this song this week with my boys…

I was thinking of all the many things that needed to get done before I headed to work that day. I was preoccupied with things, and not paying enough attention at that moment, to my sons. Peter came up to me, and trying to tickle me, (Daddy showed him my tickle spots!!!) and I was reminded to take those moments as they came. So, I laughed a huge, fake, boisterous laugh, and my Peter Bug laughed harder than I had ever heard him before. Shortly, Hudson joined us, and we tickled each other, laughing very loudly, and hard, and as those precious moments came to a close, I realized, it doesn’t matter if the dishes are done, or the laundry folded…is the bed made? No? Oh well…these are my moments to be a mom. Too soon, and it will all be over, so I am grabbing onto them with both hands, and hanging on!!!! If all they remember of me is my fake laugh while rolling on the floor with them, or reading books, or playing with cars than I am a happy Mom!!!! They will not remember that the kitchen was clean that day, or their laundry folded and put away. But they will remember me. I want them to remember a Momma that could make them laugh!!!!

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Making it look easy

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She walked by me, pushing her newborn daughter in her stroller. She was well-dressed, with her perfectly manicured fingers as she touched her sleeping daughters perfectly curled hair.

She glanced at me and smiled, and said, “You have your hands full!”

In that instant I realized what we must look like through her eyes. 2 little boys, running in opposite directions, tearing up magazines, and screaming in delight at everyone in the office. They each held a graham cracker in their hand, and laughed loudly as they ate. Their hair was matted, and going crazy directions. Scroll over to the mom…crazy hair, dirty t-shirt with graham crackers all over it. Sitting in a heap on the floor, trying to wrangle two active babies..I’m sure we looked quite the sight.

In that moment, I looked at that sleeping newborn, and thought, “I wonder what it’s like to have one child.” Now, trust me, I have never, and will never wish I didn’t have twins. But sometimes, very seldomly, I compare myself to those moms. They have one-on-one time with their child, and that is one thing I will always wish I had.

As I compare myself with them, I try to remember, my parenting style is different because I am different. And my circumstances are different. But neither are better than each other.

As I sat there in my heap, trying not to become overwhelmed, I was reminded…my kids are happy, they’re alive, and healthy. What else can I ask for?!

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Growing Up!

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Caleb said it best this morning, when he said, “Tell them to slow down!” Yes, my babies are growing up, and somehow, when they turned 1, their development took off, and it’s been a whirlwind few weeks trying to keep up!

Let’s start with Peter..obviously, he’s a few weeks behind Hudson, developmentally, which is not a problem health-wise..it’s just a child to child difference :)…that being said, he is so adventurous and daring, that during the few weeks that Hudson was scared to walk, we did actually think that Peter would walk first! He jumps everywhere, not caring what he might hit in the process haha…he’s quite brave, and tries new things everyday!

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A few weeks ago, he finally started saying intelligible words! He talks a lot haha…but most of it, I can’t understand, but on that day, I put them down for a nap, and said, “bye-bye!” And to my great surprise, he waved back and said, “bye-bye!” Yay Peter! Which is what I said, and he clapped, and laughed and said it again! So proud of himself! Well, day by day, he goes back and forth now from saying, “dye-dye,” and “bye-bye.” Today, while reading a book with Mommy and Hudson, he looked up at me and said, “book!” As clear as day! Yes Peter, that’s a book!

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Everyday, they grow up more and more, and I am amazed when thinking back at where we were a year ago, one baby home, and one still in the hospital! Things have changed soooo much!

Now for my sweet Hudson boy! He is walking everywhere now! He has started trying to run! Which is crazy for this Mommy! Good thing I have only one walker so far haha. He says so many words now, “lights, turtle, bye-bye, nana (banana)” and today, we added cheetah! I was reading them the animal book, and the first page was a cheetah, so I told him what it was, and he pointed at it, and said, “shh-tah!” Smart boy! One of his favorite things to do is put toys (any toy) up to his ear, and say, “Dad?” Like he’s talking on the phone to Daddy. It’s so cute now to hear them making words their own….instead of Dada, they both now say Dad! Although when trying to get his attention, they do say Dada still.

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It’s been a fun month, watching them grow up so quickly, and I can’t wait to see how the next 11 months will change us even more!

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Birthday Adventure

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Before the boys birthday, I posted about Hudson’s tummy bug which led into a cold we picked up at the doctor’s office. He passed that cold on to Caleb, Peter and I…yep, all 4 of us were sick at the same time! 2 of us are over it, 2 of us are still hanging onto it.

Well, after a long birthday/party day, Hudson was not doing good at all…he was wheezing so loud, and high pitched, I was getting nervous. I called the doctor’s on-call nurse, as well as texting my nurse sister. The one thing the on-call nurse and I were concerned about was that he was about to go to sleep for the night, and I was worried that I wouldn’t hear him if something got worse. After talking to me for a few minutes, the nurse suggested we go get him checked out…he either still had just a cold, or it had turned into bronchulitis, a form of RSV…I got off the phone with her, picked up my baby boy, and off we went…

I know, I know…I stressed out like a first-time mom…but he was a preemie with a low immune system thanks to the tummy bug, and I really just wanted to be safe with him.

My sister Mary was still in town from the boys party, so I called her, and asked her to sit at the hospital with me and Hudson…I was feeling pretty miserable by that point, so really, Mary did most of the caring for him lol…we got to the hospital at 9:30 pm, and finally saw the doctor at 3:30 am….Hudson slept about 30 minutes of that lol…

He learned to walk at the hospital that night…before, he had taken a few steps, then he would sit down. That night, he walked all over the place, talking to people, and making friends. He was so brave and curious, and I was so proud of him.

Turned out, he just had a cold still, nothing more, but we were right to take him in. We got home around 5:00 am, and Peter let us sleep in til 9! And thankfully, Peter let us do that for the next few days, which was wonderful, so Hudson and I could catch up on our sleep.

Proud of my curious, brave, wonderful boy!

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One Year Old

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My dear sons, how can you be a year already? How have these days flown by so quickly! Wasn’t it just yesterday, I was released from the hospital, only to return after a quick bath, and sit with my babies?! Wasn’t it just the other day you were released, Hudson? Those first few weeks, you slept so well at night, I really, honestly, thought, “this is easy! I can do this!” A few weeks later, Peter joined you at home, and I spent the first night in tears, wondering when I would ever sleep again.

One year later, everything has changed…you both sleep all night! You talk all the time, eat like champs, and LOVE your Mama and Dada so very much!

We had a wonderful fun party with family and friends that have prayed for us, supported us, and have loved you both very much!

Enjoy a few pictures from our day!

I am so proud of the little men you are turning into, and I cannot wait to see who you become!! Happy Birthday to my baby boys! Er….toddler boys (choking back tears)!!!!! Mama is so proud of you!

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Sick little man

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I have been reminded these past couple weeks that I am still the mother of 2 preemies. Hudson got a tummy bug, not sure where from, but after 5 days, I took him to the dr to make sure it wasn’t bacterial, and to see if there was anything else I should be doing. The dr told me that most babies are getting rid of this bug in 3-4 days….It took Hudson 9 days!

Unfortunately, while we were at the dr, a little boy came in, coughing up a storm….the nurses immediately whisked him away, but the damage was done, and my poor little boy’s immune system was not where it should be….therefore, he now has a cold!

Last year at this time, I was worrying about oxygen levels, and making sure my boys were breathing okay…this year, I’m worrying about oxygen levels, and making sure my boy is breathing okay! Lol. Pray for him, seriously though…because he still is considered a preemie, he is at risk for RSV, which can be very serious, and this cold could easily turn into RSV for him.

One silver lining to Hudson getting sick: he wants to cuddle ALL the time! Daddy and I love cuddling with them, so we sure don’t mind, and he’s been so sweet still, during these past couple weeks!

Get better for your party little man!!!!! Exciting posts to come!!!!

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